Wednesday, July 28, 2021

Conversations to Have With Snakes

I have had to do enough metaphysical conversations with snakes in my campaigns that it's worth making a table about it now. 

Possibly applicable for dragons, too.

The Philosophical Snake is the most dangerous predator of all...
For philosophers, anyway.


1. Do Nightmares Have Dreams?

What is the dream of a dream? 
Sometimes, laying in stillness, I see The Moon.

2. What Does Time Taste Like?

I think it tastes like mice.
Little mice hiding very still, their heartbeats beating like raindrops in a storm.
It tastes coiled, full of a fearful potential energy, on the cusp of a sudden frantic leap...

3. Do Illusions Feel Pain?

I have bitten a phantasm and it recoiled and wept. It tasted empty.
It would be little different for you, I think...

4. What Is The Shape of God?

I think it is the shape like mine.
Powerful, elusive, flexible, growing. It sheds its skin and smaller things come to feast on it. 
It could swallow everything. Perhaps it already has.

5. Do Mice Have Free Will?

They all run and hide and scream. I think if they had agency some might not struggle... 
Will you struggle? Have you agency, or is it determined that you will resist?
(If power is all that determines agency, then which of us has free will?)
Have all the events and causalities of the universe irrevocably led to this moment, where I swallow you whole for nourishment?
Have we any true choice in this matter of consumption? Can I decide not to eat you, tasty meal?
What use is agency to I? Just a way to excuse missing a meal?
(All arguments shall be restated using examples of the snake eating the opposing conversationalists.)

6. Hello, I Am Snake.

(Use This. Type in all player responses.)

7. What Is Joy?

When I have eaten I feel at peace, but it is a still peace. A quiet peace.

8. Why Do You Not Consume Babies?

They are nutritious, soft and delicious, and easy to digest. They do not resist. They have little permanence.
Babies are the best of foods, and yet you spurn them. Why?
What does it matter that it be human or not?

1 comment:

  1. I love weird conversations with inhuman creatures! As a DM, Speak With Animals is my favorite spell for my players to get.

    Birds are dumb, chatty and always hungery. Cats can't grasp the concept of exchange.