Wednesday, September 16, 2020

Seal of the University

(Contains repeated material from earlier posts.)

Located down the promenade from Gallax Hall in Wizard City Hexcrawl, the mighty Seal of the University lies at the heart of hallowed grounds intersecting the thoroughfares five great buildings: The Hand of the Archmages, the Bureau of Spatial and Temporal Matters, the Pyramid of Providence, The Graduate Library, and Gallax Hall.

A great brass pentagram lies embedded in the stone, depicting the five esoteric items that symbolize the university's commitment to sorcery and magic:
  • The Lamp of Knowledge
  • The Hourglass of Eons
  • The Eye of Providence
  • The Tome of Secrets
  • The Word of Truth
Each item aligning respectively with each building above. Along the perimeter of the pentagram, are words in plain language for all to comprehend:

"UNIVERSITY OF CHRONULUS: 
ALL THOSE WHO DEFACE THIS SEAL SHALL PERISH."

And indeed, all those who deface or step upon the seal are instantly slain. Every few years or so a freshman is goaded into testing the seal's magic by cruel upperclassmen or measuring faculty, only to wither away to nothing but bones in a matter of moments before the eyes of the entire school. It is considered a test for foolhardy wizards who would dare to meddle in the affairs of the unknown or the rules of the university without proper respect.

There's an urban myth in my hometown that anybody who
stepped on the M would fail their first bluebook exam.

As a crossroads of sorts within the University, one can see and meet a variety of students and professors simply going about their business (and staying far away from the Seal).

Undergraduates
AC Unarmored  HD 1-4  HP 1-16  MoraleWizard 1-4
1d4 Knife
Spells: 1/2HD: Roll Once ; 3/4HD: Roll Twice


Undergraduates have 1HD per academic year attended. 
Freshman = 1HD, Sophomore = 2HD, Junior = 3HD, Senior = 4HD.


Everyone despises them. Nobody respects them. The bottom of the academic food chain. Ranked according to their Year. For when a singularly important student is required, roll on the following table:


d20
Name
Spell
Appearance
Personality
1
Alstaff
Alarm
Puffy-eyed
Screaming Goblin
2
Bee
Burning Hands
Too short
Glitching Automaton
3
Chew
Charm Person
Anxiety-inducing
No Pet Only Throw
4
Dennis
Color Spray
Mutant
Secret Snake Person
5
Elvis
Comprehend Languages
2/10
Get A’s or Get Graves
6
Falgrave
Detect Magic
Vomit-skinned
Bubblemint Pretty Princess
7
Gemini
Disguise Self
Fit like a walrus
Gym Rat King
8
How
Feather Fall
Euthanized
Beavis
9
Ilidia
Find Familiar
Dungeons-under-eyes
Egg-Eater
10
June
Floating Disk
Ghost?
One Step Above Zombie
11
Karol
Fog Cloud
Bleeding
Professor’s Pet
12
Lep
Grease
Hairy-lipped
“My Parents Are Rich!”
13
Minnie
Hideous Laughter
Albino frog
“I’m From The West Coast”
14
Nupital
Identify
Dingle dangle
Dog in a Sausage Shop
15
Organ
Illusory Script
Too tall
Lazy Serial Arsonist
16
Philinx
Jump
Sailing ears
I Drink Bleach
17
Quop
Mage Armor
Father was clearly a snake
Psychology Major
18
Rins
Magic Missile
Tuberculosis, personified
Bum At Heart
19
Segg
Silent Image
Cancer beefsteak
Noodles and Doodles
20
Timet
Sleep
Like an actual human being
Scary Clown



Graduate Students
AC Leather  HD 4-6  HP 4-24  MoraleWizard 4-6
1d6 Long Knife
Spells: Roll twice on Spell Column
+3 from Undergraduate Spell List


Graduate Students have 4 + 1HD per two years graduate schooling.

Graduate Students are smart enough to never give their real names to anyone. Hence, whenever someone asks for their name, they’ll give something obviously fake. It won't even be the same fake name every time, just to throw you off.


Professors might actually tolerate them, as they’ve proven themselves useful. Only the most ruthless students survive the undergraduate program and decide to continue their studies.


d20
Fake Name
Spell
Appearance
First on the Hit List:
1
John Doe
Animate Dead
Evil gnome
Undergrads...
2
Jane McClane
Bestow Curse
Scary goth
Their Mentor...
3
Call Me Jack
Blink
More piercing than flesh
Their Partner...
4
Eye P. Freely
Clairvoyance
No face
Their Father...
5
None O. Yerbizz
Fear
Sumo!
Their Mother...
6
Bigby
Fireball
Literally on fire
Their Abjuration Instructor...
7
Salamander Hammerhead
Fly
Trench coat ate a person
Their Siblings...
8
Full Powers
Gaseous Form
Glitter central
Fellow Program Rivals...
9
Macaroni Rioux
Haste
Elder spawn
Custodians...
10
Milkshake Mike
Hypnotic Pattern
Secret skeleton
The Police...
11
Molly Prepper
Lightning Bolt
Librarian hobo
The Secret Police...
12
Shirly Temple
Major Image
Elf on a shelf
The Ultra-Secret Police...
13
Cassidy Dance
Nondetection
Knockoff Shrek
Everyone...
14
Mollux Prime
Phantom Steed
Bootleg preppy
The Dean...
15
Lisa
Prot. from Energy
A dirty, filthy gun
Ghosts...
16
Ludwig Von Blap
Remove Curse
Goldfish bowl supervillain
Geese...
17
Frank Yips
Sending
Spaceman hermit
Professor Sitch...
18
Wendy
Sleet Storm
TUBES
And That Little Dog, Too...
19
Esther Candlelime
Slow
Doc Ock with a Glock
All Their Imaginary Friends...
20
Contessa Q.
Stinking Cloud
Bionic coffee press
You!...

Professors
AC Leather + Shield  HD 6-10  HP 6-40  Morale 10  Wizard 6-10
1d8 Longer Knife
Spells: According to Department
+2 on Graduate Spell List
+3 on Undergrad Spell List


Now THESE right here are proper Wizards. Professors form the backbone of the University. A Tenured Professor will be infamous for their exploits, their genius, and their utter lack of accountability. Most, except perhaps the most egotistical and powerful, will be referred to only by their first initial, because names carry power.


d20
Department of...
Pioneering Spell
Professor...
Minion(s)
1
Torture
Mass Pain
R
Four sycophants
2
Medicine
Summon Gout
P
Talking tumor
3
Familiars
Charm Familiar
N
Thirty cats
4
Tongues
Speak With Eyes
W
Magic mouths spontaneously erupting from every surface
5
Reality
Shade
4
1d6 Clones
6
Accounting
Locate Psychopath
$
2d4 Student Calculators
7
Circles
Protection from Students
M
Magic Circle that crawls along the floor around them
8
Venoms
Hands to Spiders, Arms to Snakes, Bones to Bees
L
Beeeeeeeeeees!
9
Thought
Bestow Thought
Q
Floating brain in jar
10
Space and Time
Omni-Adjacency
&
Themself from the past
11
Tailors
Hat of Faces
K
Living, Talking Robes
12
Grammar
Misspell Magic
Y
Walking, talking dictionary
13
Spying
Detect Crime
!
Definitely NOT the Secret Police...
14
Charms
Power Word: Ignominy
J
Floozies
15
Whales
Combust Fat
B
Ghost Whale Calf
16
Names
_____ 's Instant Summons
V
1d4 Foolish Student Thralls
17
Elements
Wall of Swords
T
Two tiny little oozes
18
Forms
Ethereal Flying Kick
Z
A very petty old philosopher
19
Elves
Memory Souffle
C
Contingent of Woodland Creatures
20
Crystals
Magic Jar
H
Sentient Rock

3 comments:

  1. This is great. I love your Wizard City stuff - just ran into it recently.

    Are postdocs super grad students or scary, hungry proto-professors? Does each one carry a clock embedded in their flesh counting down to their spectacular doom if they can't trick a department into offering them a teaching position?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As in all things, I imagine that it varies by Department.

      Delete