The Tidelock party has had a drug cook in their basement for the longest time and I was never really sure how to roleplay him until a few weeks ago when off the cuff I decided he should be like a old sea captain.
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YARRR! (From The Lighthouse) |
Sir Morgan Bacardi Kraken Havana Appleton is cooking up some drugs!
He will always sample them before offering.
d10 | Drug Appearance | Arrrr! It’ll... | Side Effects May Include... | And... |
1 | A fine white powder. | Turn yer eyes inside out, so ye can see the insides of yer skull! | Hydrocephalus | Anarchistic Thought |
2 | Small yellow crystal like a kidney stone. | Give ye visions of yer own dying rotten putrescence! | Teething | Religious Disjunction |
3 | White powder with a little bit of blood in it. | Give ye the pep ye need to get that promotion! | Blindness | Hallucinations About Spiders |
4 | Clear liquid coated on a rusty nail. | Straighten ye out like a fine razor! | Lockjaw | Kidney Failure |
5 | Orange liquid slurped from a lit lantern. | Put hair on yer armpits! An’ gusto in yer gizzard! | Orbital Bleeding | Thalassophobia |
6 | Rubbery thing jammed up nose. | Make yer hair fall out! | Hair Loss | Doing Philosophy |
7 | Wrinkly black moldy chunk. | Make ye smooth like a baby’s bottom! | Cyanosis | Impotency |
8 | Neon yellow syringe | Shine a great an’ terrible light in the darkest pits o’ yer soul! | Gout | Craving for Human Flesh |
9 | Glowing rock | Bequeath ye the stomach to digest even the hardest o’ bones! | Dysentery | Stockholm Syndrome |
10 | It’s a fish knife. Why? | Spill yer beans like a blubberin’ boy nary a day separate from his mum! | Jaundice | Nostalgia |
The immediate and important question my players asked: "Who the hell knighted this guy??"
ReplyDeleteI assume this means he accepts peerage and other non-monetary valuables in lieu of cash. And, as a corollary, that there's someone running around who used to be a knight who traded their title to feed their drug habit.
DeleteGenius!
DeleteAaaar! Perfect for Talk Like a Pirate Day, ye scurvy dog!
ReplyDeleteI'll need to expand on this in September then!
Delete