Poor Auction

Found by the Wish Well in Wizard City Hexcrawl.

Cruel as Wizard City is, it is not without minute capacity for empathy for the plight of the impoverished. Historically, when the number of wizards in poverty achieves critical mass the city tends to boil over into rebellion, and rebelling wizards are particularly hazardous for capital.

So, after the Second Giant Fist Rebellion of 579, a process was instituted for residential districts to shoulder virtually all the responsibility of assisting the poor... Which naturally gravitated towards the lowest bidder. Districts periodically form assemblies constituting of various property owners to auction off the assignment of handling poor wizards short on magic, known as Poor Auctions. Anyone can partake in these Auctions, provided they can convince the assembly that they're actually doing what they say they'll be doing... Or sometimes not. (Exploitation and fraud are common in these auctions. Nobody's brought them to Suit Court yet, though.)

The resources and facilities provided by these Poor Auctions, while technically free, are notoriously inadequate and inhumane. Anyone can access them, provided they seem impoverished enough.

WHAT ACCOMODATIONS FOR THE MAGICALLY IMPOVERISHED?

d12	Eating...	Clothing...	Living In...	Medical...	Funeral...
1	Transmuted Krill	A used bath towel	An Enlarged Hand-Me-Down Shoe	One shot of cheap whiskey per night.	Thrown in the river.
2	Table scraps, like a dog.	Conspicuous bright orange jumpsuit	A lowest-bidder poorhouse	The communal bandages and splints.	Tossed in the Bottomless Pit.
3	Whey. Nothing but whey.	Bloodstained smock	An extradimensional closet.	Whatever gets scavenged from The Junk Pile	Fed to stray dogs.
4	One half-loaf of moldy bread per day.	Amateur avant garde rejected prototype jerkins	A sewer junction	Whatever gets scavenged from Surgeon Row	Doubled up into an already occupied grave.
5	Thin watery gruel.	Clownishly oversized pantaloons	A sweatshop	Free test samples from medical companies.	Shredded into plant fertilizer.
6	As many roasted rats as you can catch.	Regulation army surplus underwear	The Poor House	Expired serums.	Zombified for work detail.
7	Compacted cockroach protein bars.	Bags N’ Rags	Inexplicable trash cave	“Nothing a little fire won’t cure!”	Donated to science.
8	Anything Soup	Reject ‘Intelligent’ Clothing	A decent cage, as far as cages go	Free amputations.	Adorn a serial-killer’s trophy room.
9	The leftover sticks from Meat-On-A-Stick	A single leaf for modesty	Literal house of cards	Someone shouts at you to ‘just feel better’	Buried in the Junk Pile.
10	Gruel cut with sawdust	Newspaper toga	Gingerbread lean-to (doubles as food!)	A bucket full of anti-louse powder	Catapulted into another district.
11	Grass clippings mixed in water	Louse powder and a burlap sack	A whale’s mouth	Cold showers	Rendered into luxury soap.
12	Get your own food!	Two tank tops	Not-So-Horrible Black Void™	Medical, what medical??	Properly buried, but nobody cares to recall their name.